Tears of joy… for a change

There have been some hard lessons learned in the last couple of weeks. A few tears of confusion, sadness, and loss. Some big disappointments – mostly because as a teacher, I have chosen an altruistic life and it’s hard for me to make sense of it when people aren’t altruistic – a blog on this another day. I really don’t care if tears are considered weakness by some – so what? I’ve been to hell and back more than a few times and I cry when I need to cry. My weight was not the biggest challenge I’ve overcome. And the events of the last few weeks, while upsetting, aren’t all that important. Over all, I realize that I made new friends and rekindled old friendships. And in the end, I’m stronger. A little less trusting, but stronger in many ways.

Today, I was able to dead lift the most weight I’ve ever done – 195 pounds. I did it for two sets, 6 reps each, with only my weight belt for extra help – no straps and no grips. That 195 number was significant to me. That’s almost the same as my starting weight when I started this journey. I weighed 198 pounds in the photo above. Initially, I felt pumped up with pride and a little aggressive. But later I sat on a bench in the locker room and cried for a minute. Tears of joy. Tears of gratitude.

What’s really exciting is that I still haven’t taken my real “after” picture. 🙂

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