What Do You Want First? The Bad News or the Real Bad News?

As I write this, I’m sitting next to my husband’s hospital bed.  My understanding about what I considered “bad news” has been… adjusted.

Earlier this week, I mentioned I got some bad news that rocked me a little bit.  On Wednesday, I got another DXA bodyfat analysis scan.  I got one last October.  I’ve actually done these scans a couple times a year for the last three years.  Over the last three months, I’ve been doing a mini-cut.  Nothing drastic – I was supposed to lose about 1/2 pound a week. I was doing an upper/lower body strength/hypertrophy split. Everything worked twice a week, once for strength and a second time a couple days later with lighter weights and 8-12 reps. No cardio at all.  The results?   I’ve lost fat, but also muscle.  A lot more muscle than fat according to the scan results.  It was a shock.

I decided to take a couple rest days and regroup. I sent the data and all logs to someone to analyze. Waiting to hear what he thinks before I move ahead with a Plan B. He gave me the protocol I was following, so now he has results so he can fine tune things.    My plan was to get started again on Saturday.  I’d increase my calories to maintenance and change the lifting protocol to a more traditional body-part-a-day split.  More food.  More recovery time.

And then something happened.  This is the Real Bad News…

My husband was in a car accident Friday night.  I think it was a miracle that the only injury he had was a broken patella.  He had surgery yesterday.  He’s going to have a rough couple of months while it heals.  The hardest part is going to be immobile.  He is a strong, self-reliant guy and this is going to be difficult for him.  I’m switching gears.  I’m in ‘caretaker’ mode now.   We spent the whole weekend at the hospital, so I need a few days off of work to get things set up at home so he can get around safely and have food to eat.

Making things work at home for him is my first priority.  Teaching is my second.  My own training isn’t really a priority – it’s a coping mechanism.  I need it.  So it doesn’t matter why I train.  I need to train.  Everything else falls into some spot behind everything else.  I have to be honest with myself about what I can and cannot do.  I may not be posting as much. Or I may find that writing helps. We’ll see.

One thing that I won’t ever forget – a set back in training is NOT A PROBLEM.  It’s just a thing to fix.  Life is messy and there will be real problems.  I’ve been lucky to have been able to navigate through mild storms to this point.  If I’m going to practice what I preach, I’ll get through this bigger storm, too.

However, I am officially “off track” with my training and food for the last few days.  I’ve been eating at the hospital cafeteria and Starbucks.  (A stranger bought my coffee this morning.  I cried.  Explained that it has been a stressful weekend and his kindness was very appreciated.)  I may be off track, and it’s tempting to quit using my husband and my job as reasons why, but I can’t do that.  I don’t think my husband would let me do that.  So, I’ll take a few days off work so I can make sure things are manageable for hubby at home.  I’ll find a way to get back on track by the end of the week.


Home now.  Hubby is napping on and off.  I’m relieved.


Filed under Life

7 responses to “What Do You Want First? The Bad News or the Real Bad News?

  1. Colin DeWaay

    Sometimes it takes unfortunate things to happen to help us remember what’s important in life, doesn’t it? I’m very happy to hear it wasn’t more serious. Take care of him like the great wife you clearly are!


  2. Thanks for sharing with us how you are going through some very emotional personal circumstances and what your thought process is…you are such an amazing teacher even through personal adversity and challenges!! Thank you! Monique


  3. Tammy, you and your husband are in my prayers.


  4. This too shall pass. You’re doing fine.


  5. Thinking of you and your husband. One day at at time girl.


  6. Michele

    Prayers for you hubby. I fractured my kneecap and sustained a severe patella bone bruise in October 2013. 4 months later I am still not recovered to a before status. I will pray for his patience, more patience and his eventual mobility. Thank you for sharing that although adversity affects your fitness journey that it doesn’t totally derail it. You are such an inspiration!


  7. I’m so sorry about your husband – It’s good to hear he doesn’t have any worse injuries and that he’s home recovering. Car accidents are always scary because they can happen any time and you never know what could happen. Sometimes I think I could use a good dose of perspective like that.


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