Category Archives: Life

It’s Getting Real Now

41 days left as a public teacher.

Making progress through the checklist towards retirement…

  • Turned in my resignation letter.

  • Met with rep at Human Relations. (A lovely young woman named Caitlyn.  Grateful for the chance to meet her!)

  • Putting together the paperwork for the state retirement system.  (More complicated than it should be.)

  • Signed my school district’s Letter of Intent yesterday, but this time, for the first and only time, I had to choose the “I reject employment…” option.

That “I reject…” declaration threw me for a loop and triggered a little spike in cortisol that lasted for another 8 hours.


I’m excited and thrilled to take the risk to work for myself.  But I’m also nervous, praying, a little scared – all the feels.  This is a major life change.  


Our state striped away a lot of retirement benefits almost 10 years ago.  Even though I’m retiring early, I wouldn’t get much more if I stayed longer.  


So my last day with classes is June 11.  Teachers have an extra day on June 12.  My teaching contract is split over 12 months, so that is done at the end of July.


I’ve been working steadily since last fall to set up my online math tutoring business, www.OnlineGeometryTutor.com.  I’m not known online as a math teacher, so I knew creating content for that would take time.


Still working on the details of the online fitness service I want to offer. 


From my own experiences with this health transformation and talking to a lot of people about their struggles, frustrations, and *most importantly* the obstacles that prevent them from sticking with the plan, 
I know there is a need for something more than a plan on a spreadsheet.


There is a need for something more than just being told or shown what to do.  


Even me, working with one of the best bodybuilding coaches in the industry,  with his scary-smart programming, with my determination, work-ethic, and the experience of five competitions –
it’s still hard


Life happens for all of us, but life is also different for some of us. 


It’s a bit of a different challenge when you’re a middle-aged adult with adult responsibilities.


It’s a slightly different challenge when there are people counting on you who might not be able (or willing) to accept that your self-care is just as important as the role you play in their lives.


People assume that the thing they are missing is some character trait.  Maybe.  Maybe not. 
 What if it is something I can teach?  What if it’s something you know but just need support to bring it to the surface?


I’m in “plan mode” now until I’m done with the day job.  My first priority are the kiddos in my classes now.  And then I need to pack up my teacher life and turn in keys.


And then probably have a bit of a cry, take some time to decompress, and enjoy the backyard patio my husband is fixing up for “retirement” as I write this post.


If you’re on my
mailing list, I promise – you will be first to know when I have something to offer!

***

Training is progressing, but it makes for a boring blog post.  I think I’m max testing next week.  THAT should be interesting!  I’ve been growing.  🙂

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Filed under Life, Teaching

Building Phase Update

Hi!

The grind continues!  My job as a bodybuilder right now is to get bigger and stronger.  This isn’t the glamorous part – but this is the most important part.

 

The first few months after my last competition were all about recovery and healing.  Most people don’t really think about weight loss as “tissue loss”, but that’s exactly what happens.  Fat is tissue.  But so is everything else – muscle, tendons, ligaments, bones, organs…all tissues that may be damaged a little by a long bout of dieting.

 

Many bodybuilders get hurt in the months after a competition season because they don’t give themselves time and calories to recover.

 

However, I gained more weight than I was supposed to.  I’m about 40 lbs over stage right now.  I know there are “hard-core-I-stay-lean” competitors reading this right now who might be judging my process, so it is hard for me to admit that I lost control a little.  And as a former fat person, I’ve got mixed feelings about that.   I’m a little embarrassed.

 

I remind myself that I was cutting hard for the better part of two years and I’ve been “in control” for nine years.  I needed time to replace all kinds of tissue and I NEEDED a psychological break from the nutrition precision.  It was also important to be able to relax and enjoy the holidays and my birthday with my husband.  

 

That said – some of that 40 lbs is muscle.  🙂

 

No idea how much and I don’t really want to check just yet.  I’m enjoying my psychological break from caring.

 

So my data has to be based on what I see, how I feel, and gym performance.

 

My calculated bench press PR jumped up 20 lbs in 8 weeks!  I think I mentioned that before.  Still getting stronger.  Not testing again for about a month.

 

All upper body is growing.  Back is growing.  Glutes are growing.  Quads – I don’t know.  Been having some issues with knee pain, so I’ve been careful with my leg work.  I’m not injured – I think it’s the beginning of arthritis.  I’m 56 and have been lifting for almost 8 years, so I expected the joints to age a bit.

 

Started a mini cut this week just because I’m not comfortable being this heavy.  Clothes don’t fit and I don’t have a lot of endurance.  Weight isn’t great for the knees and feet, either.  The plan is to cut what I can until mid-June.  Over the next year, it’s important that I spend most of the time NOT in a calorie deficit. 

 

I am in the body-building phase for about another year.  Next competition season will be 2020.  Not sure which shows.  Just know I don’t want to compete next year.   Big plans for 2018-2019, though!

 


In other news...

Still working every day on building my new online tutoring business.  I’ve been making a lot of progress with website improvements, content creation, and social media marketing.  The learning curve is steep.  It’s also a bit weird to be an “unknown” in the world for the thing I’ve been doing for over 20 years.  Need to create an “online presence” as the business coaches say.

Regardless, I’m a good teacher and I enjoy teaching math to teenagers – which is a niche.  When I’m working with kids online, it is amazingly fun.  A…MAY…ZING!!

I’m really excited to be able to do this thing I enjoy in private practice – to focus on teaching and doing it on my own terms. 

(Schools do the best they can under some less-than-optimal conditions, so I don’t want to sound like I’m biting the hand that feeds me.  Over time, my philosophy about math instruction has changed.  I truly believe big classes are NOT the best way for teens to learn math.  Until schools can find a way to individualize, parents need to learn about the new options that are out there.  I know it was eye-opening for me!)    

 

Just in case you might be interested, a second business, one that is fitness-related, is in the works and should be ready to be launched by the end of the year.    

And there is that book I was supposed to write a couple years ago…


And then there’s this…

I spent a few months volunteering time to train a woman involved with the Rise and Grind program at my gym.  This program helps women recovering from addiction with regular exercise and nutrition.

 

For those of us who used the same approach to transform our own lives, this just makes sense.  But it’s so much more important considering the battle they wage – they aren’t just trying to get healthier – they are tearing away from dysfunction and recreating their lives.  The courage it takes to do that is impressive.  Remember how it felt to walk into a gym the first time?  Intimidating, right?  Now imagine what it must be like for one of these women.  It was humbling for me to participate as little as I did.  

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Please consider treating yourself to one of their t-shirts or hoodies.  I love mine!  The fabric is light and soft.  The logo is badass!

Contact Grant Denton (modeling his program’s new hoodies below) directly by visiting the Facebook page, @RiseandGrindReno.  If you do, will you do me a favor and let them know I sent you?  I’d like the Rise and Grind ladies to feel the LMS love and support – like HUGE bear hug!   Thank you!

 

 

 

 

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Filed under Bodybuilding Journal, Life, Teaching

Oh Hey – It’s My Birthday Again!

Eight minutes from the exact time I started writing this post, I will precisely be 55 years old.  I always miss my mom on my birthday.

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Me and Mom

Took some progress pictures today.  I’m not competing until July, and based on how this prep has been going, it highly likely that my conditioning will be better than it was the last time I competed.  I’m humbled and grateful that I’m able to do this considering I didn’t become any kind of athlete until later in life.   I’ve become less comfortable sharing my progress pictures for many reasons.  But this blog started when I started this new life, so I also think it’s important to document where I’m at now.

Today’s pictures compared to October when I started this prep…

Oct 2016 - Started Prep

Oct 2016 – Started Prep

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10-8-16-back

 

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Can’t lie.  I’m a bit freaked out about this birthday.  I remember being younger thinking that being 55 would be close to retirement – which I might be, but haven’t really decided on that yet. (2/16/17 edit – at the end of this day, I’m leaning towards “sooner rather than later” on that retirement thing.  Love, love, love the kids. It will never be anything about them that pushes me out.) Digging what I’m doing as a teacher right now and I passionately believe it’s a better way for humans to learn mathematics.  I’d like to hang in until I work out the bugs and evolve it.

55 is also a big one because my mother died when she was 56.  Intellectually, I think I’ve done enough to alter my own path, health-wise, to live longer than my mom did, but she died of a brain aneurysm.  We don’t know if that was a hereditary condition or a consequence of her smoking, poor diet, lack of exercise, and stress.

Did I say I am grateful?  I woke up today extremely grateful to be here.

My husband created most of the gifts he gave me.  Aren’t they amazing?  His time and the little things he included in these paintings (he used his thumb print to color the heart with the tree) made these the most memorable gifts I’ve ever received.

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Hubby had to work today, but I took the day off.  I needed to renew my driver’s license since it expired today.  Took my little girl pup with me.  We stopped at a local duck pond for a short walk on the way home.  Poor thing has been cooped up in the house.  Weather here hasn’t been conducive for walks.  I also have a nagging issue with my left ankle and foot.  Nothing serious, but long dog walks aggravate it.

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Started a new training phase this week.  It’s a very different split than what I’ve ever done before.  Coach has me doing full body four days a week for a month with a bit lighter loads.  It’s probably going to be good.  The first week will be bumpy because I need to adjust my habits.  My little gym doesn’t have everything I need, so I have to travel to another one for that one thing I do need on that one day – the logistics need to be worked out.   He also incorporated the use of RPE (Rate of Perceived Exersion) to determine the loads I use.  It’s an uncomfortable adjustment for me to make.  I mentally rehearse my lifts the night before.   When I don’t have an actual load given on the spreadsheet, I ruminate on it a bit – and that’s not relaxing at all.  It’s probably just difficult for me right now because I’m working so much and I’ve been dieting for 123 days.  I’m not mentally flexible right now.

It was a memorably wonderful birthday.  And I will have a carb hangover tomorrow.   It’s all good – I’m leg pressing in the morning.  I’ll turn it all into muscle.  😉

(I didn’t eat all of this candy today. Milk Duds are gone.  And there was a heart-shaped pizza. And a big slice of cheesecake.  This won’t be my last refeed, but it could be my last REFEED until July.)

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Filed under Bodybuilding Journal, Contest Prep, Life